Happy Birthday?

It's going to be my birthday in a few hours time.

But I don't really feel like celebrating it. There's no point in celebrating birthdays in my opinion. Although there's the boyfriend this year, but he's not celebrating with me. Ok la, cos it's my fault too. I didn't celebrate his with him so I guess I have no right to complain.

I am so damn tired. Why does liberation feel so tiring?

Ok, I am going to bathe and get out of this emo hall. Staying in hall makes me blue and fat. I need to go out and get some fresh air into my brain. Maybe then on, I will be way happier :)

Okay. Goodbye.

Parents.

You know how sometimes you really don't understand what a person is thinking at times? Yeah that's the feeling that I'm getting now. 

It's like, it's so rare that I come home every weekend and you have to scream and shout at me for like what lame fuck reasons. It's not like only I tsk you in the family. When you ask my cousin to do stuff that she doesn't want to do, she tsk you too. But guess what, you don't scold her, you only scold me? What kind of fuck logic is that? Double standards much?

I really don't see what's the point of returning home anymore. I mean, yea I love my parents because I know they work very hard to bring me up to who I am now. But hey, you got to realise that as parents, you have to be role models too right?

Just because you are bringing home the bread and the money does not render you the right to hurl vulgarities at others in the family when you are not feeling good.

Right, you had a bad day at work. How about mom also has her bad days at work. You see her complaining and screaming SMLJ CCB at me? No. 

And if there are friends still reading this blog of mine, if you want to someone to blame for my crude behaviour, blame my father.

And, I am just going to end off with a quote, "Not everyone who hurl vulgarities and swears are strong people." I'm sorry, but I don't think that applies to you. 

You've disappointed me, dad. Period.

Exclusiveness

Mega dislike exclusiveness. And even hate it more when you need that sense of exclusiveness to feel included. You get what I mean? Doesn't matter if you don't cos I don't really care. 

I think I am slowly proceeding towards that age where I don't really care anymore. Like, as long as I have my boyfriend, my family and my close friends with me, the rest I don't really care. Not because I don't want to be friends with them, but it's just that the amount of effort that it requires to maintain friendships with people that hardly ever reciprocates is just too damn tiring. 

So you know what? Just be happy with whatever you have and whoever is with you. Period. 

A laptop named Blackie

Bought a new lappie from the COMEX fair. And I named it Blackie, for the obvious reasons that it is a full black computer. Okay, I know I have no originality. My previous laptop was called whitey. Hmm Umm.

This laptop only costs $749. Unbelievably cheap for a laptop and for its specs. I wonder how will it be. It has been good thus far but cannot be sure la, first day of usage only. The boot up time required so far is only 60 seconds. Pretty good I would say. But we'll see if it deteriorates. I will let whoever reading this space know! :D 

First time trying Lenovo by the way. But it's not Thinkpad, it's ideapad. Don't ask me what's the difference cos I also don't know.

All I know is that I cannot use the laptop to type when my nails are drying next time cos sure will chui the manicure. The keyboard not very manicure friendly. Will keep scratching the nails one. Sian. 

Okay, this is such a weird and long rant about my new laptop called Blackie. I hope it treats me fine cos I am really damn dulan with Whitey who is so damn freaking slow now. 

Back to rehearsing my 102 slides and start doing my 202 essay :) 

G'night y'all out there! 

I need more alone time.

Life's been busy. No time to meet up with the people that I care a lot about. Haven't been going out with the boyfriend too. Simply because he is lazy and also there's no where in Singapore to go. Bah. 

I really wanna go on a date. Maybe, it's just us. We just like to chill at home. But I still want to go out. Do you know what I mean? Hai I am pretty confused by myself too :( 

I miss everything. I wish everything can return back to the start.

Friends that used to be close look so foreign now. Weird. 

KAZAM

These are the people whom I spent 5 whole days with. The second time in my life that I spent 5 days with only minimal amount of sleep. Oh my goodness. I really felt like dying at different points during the camp. I was really fighting to keep my eyes awake at some points. 

This camp opened my eyes to many things. Including the need for giving in when it comes to friendship problems. No particular friend will be the perfect friend for you. Just simply because of the reason, no one is perfect. Even friends whom you know for damn bloody long. It's really shocking when you see the different sides of your friends that throw you off your feet. And when you realise that actually, your friends judge you just like how any other acquaintance would. Honestly, at that moment, it really hurt quite a bit.

But there's something that I've learnt throughout the whole episode. If the friendship is something that you value a lot, you will learn to give in eventually. 

You will learn to close one eye to the judgments your friends put on you, you will learn to close one eye to the perspectives they have of you. No matter how much it hurts, you will learn to close an eye. 

Watching this damn amazing Taiwan drama right now. The guy is like so damn sweetz. Sigh. 

And one thing that I mega buay tahan throughout this camp. I have become so fucking tanned. You think I look normal in the picture right? Like the tan look quite healthy right? Try comparing it to the girl next to me who's drinking. What the fuck ley that's like 3 shades darker than her. 

I am like a fucking abnn now lah :( Not that I don't enjoy being tanned, but not this tanned! This is too much already :O 

And the color contrast between the tanned parts and the normal skin tones just too great. I look like a clown, as quoted from my boyfee :( 

Sucks to be me. Okay back to watching my drama. And what nots. 

Because we are only human;

It's so torturous to have to deal with so many problems and maybe end up with no one to say it to. I mean, who can we tell 100% of our problems to? Even if we don't, it's not necessarily our fault. I think? 

Someone once told me, "If you were to ask around, I think you'd be the one with most of my secrets."

Yeah, most. Not all. But most. Why?

I guess we tell people the things that we are comfortable in telling them. For example, you smoke (just saying) and you know of friends who are okay with you smoking and friends who are strongly against you smoking. It's only normal for you to want to tell friends who are okay and supportive rather than face the wrath of your other friends right?

No one, no one, will ever have the full access to whatever is going on in your heart and mind.

And that's the saddest part about being human. 

Alone

I don't like the feeling of being alone, being left out or whatsoever. I am just, too vulnerable. Today is such a day full of rants. Goodbye. 

Dilemma

Oh yeah.

There's a dilemma in my life recently.

To go for exchange in Year 2 Sem 2 or not. 

Sigh. 

Someone, help. 

Life's been boring lately which shows from the lack of updates. Watched Charmed Season 1 right now :) Love Charmed from eons ago. And my boyfriend thinks that Phoebe is very hot. Heh I think Piper is hotter though. I am so damn bored cos I am in hall and there is absolutely nothing to do other than watching videos online. Sigh pie :( Why like that. 

Might be going prawning later. I hope things will look more interesting and probably a little less awkward. I don't know how to put this oh well till the time when I find the right words then. 

I need money! Worked for 2 events so far... And the total amount collected would probably be 4XX. Pathetic though because for the amount of effort that I put in, the reward is just too little. 

Okay, boyfriend's here. Till next time then, lil secret space. 

Love

I just wish for the negativity that's in me right now to self-disperse. I am so not used to the high level of negativity and insecurity that's building up in me right now. I don't even know what is wrong :(

I blame it on the combination of the illness (fever, flu, sore throat, cough) and period. 

Please let me be well soon. I need to feel happy.

When I see your face 

There's not a thing that I would change 

Just the way you are 

And when you smile, 

The whole world stops and stares for awhile 

Cause girl you're amazing 

Just the way you are

I actually miss you being dorky and singing this song to me in the kok-est way ever. I don't know why, but I just miss you.  

Sucks to be sick

Everytime when I am sick, I crave for good food, I crave for attention, I crave for someone to hug :(

But boyfriend not gonna visit me :( Sigh pie. I am so needy when I am sick I cannot take it. Grrr.

知足常乐

"Like how he would tweet everyone back but ignore yours. How he would ignore your wall posts, and how it seems like how every girl's bf is so madly in love with them on twitter or facebook, and you're just like.. MEH."

 Took this from zhenzhen's blog. Hahahas what a cycle. But anyway, I pasted this to a MSN conversation with my boyfriend and guess his reaction?

yinghao. says:
 haha
 twitter and facebook the posts arh
 are all words one
 act act only
Inez Lau wants to enjoy the holiday. says:
 act act also cute ma...
yinghao. says:
 they act but no action one
 always like that
Inez Lau wants to enjoy the holiday. says:
 surely have those act and got action one lor
yinghao. says:
 1%
Inez Lau wants to enjoy the holiday. says:
 then that 1% is like the omgz kind alr..
yinghao. says:
 0.001%
 but then after that they cheat

He say, no reason one. Those outgoing sweet guys on Facebook and Twitter, outrightly expressing their love for the girlfriends will usually end up cheaters. So he asks me to be contented with him being sweet to me in real life. HAHAHAHAS 

Okay la, I am not complaining but I just find it very cute. Like the perspective of his like very interesting. My boyfriend right, really is one dumb block. Like jiu shi yi ge won't express his love for me in public kind. Like you know you see your friends the boyfriend right, post one heart shape on the gf's wall surely will go awww so cute kind one ley! Sigh! 

But okay la, my boyfriend also cute in his own way la hor? HEEHEEHEE! Still the best to me ^^ 

OKAY I NEED SLEEP! GOODNIGHT! (this is so random -.-)

Bangkok

Big fat peekture of myself at the airport.

Feeling ohmega shag right now after the flea. Sales was pretty bad. Didn't really earn much :( Hello people out there who are reading this blog, head over to The Ring Obsession for cheap and chic rings okay. I really love rings a lot so I understand people who want pretty rings at reasonable prices so I try to keep my prices below $10. Really really good deal.

Okay, don't know if anyone is actually reading this but I am going to do a post of the places to go in Bangkok  for shopping! :D Heeheehee. 

 I was really really feeling very cranky before Bangkok. Tired la huh. Pardon me :)

 So after we touched down... we went to the hotel which is White Orchid Hotel in Chinatown Bangkok. Okay, I wouldn't really recommend you people to take up all those deals on the coupons website. I am not saying that it's not a good deal but then they are more for adults who have flexible leave system and not students. Because, even before I redeemed my vouchers, the places for June was already VERY limited. So, I think deals are not really such a good deal afterall. 

And the hotel that we got was really.. not up to standard. All I can say was, we already got one of the better rooms (with windows and carpet) so we should thank God. 

The only good thing about our hotel is that we stay super near this SUPERBLY yummy zhi char stall that closes at like what 2 am? :D Awesome. If you shopped until damn hungry, can take taxi to White Orchid Hotel. Facing the road, turn left and walk to the zhi char stall (damn big one) with a lot of RED SHIRTS waiters and waitresses! Damn good. We paid like 150 baht for 5 HUGEASS prawns? Where to find in Singapore?! And their grilled crabs are at like 200-300 baht? Which is around S$8-S$12?! OMG.

The first night we touched down, we went to Khao San Night Market. 

Shopping there was... so so. they sell a lot of tank tops though. Like those that you see around bugis? Like the cherry in front or strawberry or bow in front kind? They have it in a whole load of other designs like sparrows. Some are really quite chio. And they are for a whooping price of 100 baht (which is S$4). Amazing! :D 

Bought shorts there too! At 200baht :D Denim shorts. Oh, one thing is that the crotch area is kinda short so ... it's very very very low hipster. If you get what I mean. But decent la. You will get used to it. And if you have nice and flat tummy, FLAUNT IT! (Sadly, I don't so I will wear long shirts..) 

And in Khao San Night Market, the good thing is, there are many pubs around that area so when you are tired of shopping can stop by for a drink. And they play English songs that makes shopping whole load more enjoyable. So if you are looking for a chillax night out shopping, Khao San will be a good choice :)

Day Two was spent at Platinum Mall.

I mean where else right? Come Bangkok confirm must go to Platinum right?! There are 2 platinum malls apparently. The newer one and the older one. Newer one price range around 350-400 baht? Older one around 200-350 baht. So if you are more cash strapped, just go to the older one. 

To be honest, I was pretty disappointed with Platinum. Okay, maybe cos my mindset was still stuck in the 100 baht era. But the items there did not really catch my eye. I guess you can still get some steals on "Far East quality" at about half the price? But not really ALL the blogshop designs are there. That's a MYTH! 

Maybe better luck at Chatuchak? (I din go there this time round!)

Owl Ring!! :D

OH! We went to Chinatown Sampeng Lane on Day Two morning too! You all can head out to this place VERY early cos they open as early as 8 am :D Well, I was particularly intrigued by this place because of the accessories! The accessories there are a STEAL. Mega love. BUT this place is pretty hard to find. I don't think I remember the way now ... But it's opposite my hotel? Somewhere there :) 

It's more of a wholesale place so they may ask you to buy 6 pcs and above. good place to go if you are going with tons of girls! Can buy shoes and sandals and bags together at wholesale price :D :D Really really good you know! Sadly I didn't have enough girls with me so... I didn't buy much shoes. 

But accessories.. are you kidding me? 12 pieces? I can easily by 24 pcs all by myself. HAHAHAS :D It was my heaven :D :D 

A very "sunshine" boyfriend who lost his shine after waiting for me for too long. He just sat at Black Canyon Coffee while waiting for me to shop.

Oh guys, there are Black Canyon Coffee Cafes on alternate levels I think? I would think that they set it that way to let boyfriends rest while the girlfriends shop! Hahahhaas :) Can consider them as resting point!! :D 

Day Three was spent at MBK and Siam Square. 

I was already wearing what I bought on Day One! Floral Tank from Khao San Night Market at 140Baht and high waisted shorts from Platinum at 250 baht :D 

MBK... Only thing worth shopping there to me is .. BLACKBERRY COVERS! There are so many blackberry covers that I cannot stop shopping. Until my boyfriend say, you got 5 phones ah?! Hahahas. Really very cute what! Imagine a Elmo blackberry bumper! OMG. I wanted to change my housing there but I didn't bring my blackberry and I don't there to change myself so.. next time then :'( There are a lot of cute iphone covers too! Really! :D 

Oh! My nails were done at MBK too for 200baht :) 

Siam Square was mehhhhh alright only. Or maybe cos I didn't really shop much. Was just chillacing with the boyfriend.

 Cute ducks outside Siam Paragon I think? :D 

Night time was spent at the night market opposite MBK and Siam Square.

I swear it is mad squeezy but there are some pretty good deals there! I got this denim oversized boyfriend shirt for 150baht! (Around S$6) Amazing or what?! Warning: REALLY REALLY REALLY squeezy. I am not lying. I almost died there. They sell cheap denim shorts too! (As cheap as 80 baht) but of course very limited sizes. I didn't bother cos I already bought WAY TOO MANY shorts. 

My trip was really short so I didn't really explore much places. So with the limited info, I hope you all (whoever is reading this blog) can enjoy yourselves in Bangkok! :D 

A piece of advice for the free sized clothes, ALWAYS compare against your body. Hem to Hem. Because even the free sized tops can be a little tight for me. The top fits but the bottom (like tummy hips area) are a little too tight... Yep! (But can wear with high waist shorts la) Like the floral tank that I am wearing, it's tight on the bottom. :( 

OKAY. GOOD IF YOU FINISH READING THE WHOLE ENTRY. 

NOW HEAD OVER TO The Ring Obsession TO SUPPORT ME HOR. COLLECTION 2 COMING UP SOON! :D 

Warms my heart

I am going to say it, I am a very superficial girl. I don't mean materialistic. I also don't mean superficial in terms of looks. But I like my boyfriend to give me surprises, gifts (doesn't have to be big) and all to feel appreciated and cherished.

That's what I told him over MSN. I like to hear sweet stuffs like I love you and all. I like to receive little gifts here and there. He told me it was not in his family culture and it's not him but he is already trying to tell me "I love you" more now. And he said he expresses his care and concern through little actions like taking note of what I like and what I don't.

I don't know about you but I'm bought over by trying. Because it's not an empty promise. Okay, I am starting to feel a bit groggy. Time for bed with happy thoughts.

Got back my results too, partially the reason behind my happiness too. But maybe only 10%? :)

I miss having you give me something without me having to ask for it.

Even if it's just a macs breakfast.

But, thank you for picking me up at the airport nonetheless. (:

Can't wait to go to bkk and get all my accessories. Fucking love rings and bracelets and bangles and etc. Oh my god :( I love accessories times ten! Okay wait times million.

Even more than I love clothes and shoes. Hahahas :) I think I have enough rings to last me all my life. But I still can't stop buying.

Going on a holiday with the boy soon. I hope it'll be good. I hope so.

But my whole body is filled with rashes omg. I hate it. So itchy and so ugly. Please go away before I leave for holiday with the boy. :( So many rashes everywhere. My underarms, my arms, my legs, my back :( Sobs. I want to die.

Fucking sad. Fucking sad. :(

Okay I am going to sleep it away.. :( Life sucks. Ccb.

Shall blog about Vietnam soon.

Apprehensive

Going on a getaway trip with the boy in the beginning of June. I am just a little apprehensive. How? It's like we are damn different when it comes to shopping and everything. Like you know, it's kinda common sense to make sure that the cabs that you take in Bangkok runs on meter before you get on the cab right? Like the flat rate confirm is out to kill you one ley? Then he say he won't do it, and ask me to do it. Okay la, like don't mind la, just kinda don't like the attitude there.

Then I like don't dare to tell him somemore cos he will say I keep complaining about things? Haiya. die lah die lah. I think travelling with friends, what more boyfriend, very dangerous. May jeopardy the relationship during the travel :'( Zhen me ban. Someone tell me ley!

Okay la, don't complain already la I shall go off already..

Leaving for Vietnam tomorrow already. Sigh, leaving Singapore with a heavy heart.

I want you to want me like the way I want you. 

Bad mood

I am damn upset now cos I don't even know whether the Bangkok trip can realize a not :( Sigh pie. Like, there isn't flight seats available for June?! Wtf ley seriously?! Why the travel agency never block off some seats for the offer one?

Moral of the story: Do not buy those deals unless you are working and have flexible leave system. 

So annoyed now :( Want to travel with the boyfriend and friends also a cannot. Smlj. Grrr. Let's just hope that there is hope in travelling in June for 2 :'(

Self-Manicure

I love to do manicures for myself. Though I think I absolutely suck at using the manicure plates and everything. But I just love experimenting new designs. Especially designs that I see on tumblr. They are just so damn amazing you know? :)

This time round I decided to do polka-dot design with baby green and baby pink :) The green is China Glaze's Refresh-Mint and the pink is just some chapalang $1 nail polish brand that I bought at Jurong Point's pasar malam :D Heeheehee.

And I played cheat. Cos the black polka dots... are drawn using permanent marker! HEEHEEHEE. Too tough to do it using black polish. Not that pro yet.


Yep, so this post is just to flaunt my new manicure. :D Heh. Bimbo, I know.

Senseless entry with some sense at the back

Recently I have been addicted to all these cute little cartoon backgrounds. I have absolutely no idea why! My handphone wallpaper currently is the cookie monster one. It matches my sms tone which makes a crunching sound. So cute so cute. My twitter dp used to be a very cute pikachu winking and now I changed it to a huge ass hello kitty face. I am just going back to my childhood days I think. Really ley, don't you think looking at the above pictures makes you very happy?! Or maybe it's just me being childish.

Whatever, it's whatever that makes me happy that counts right? ;) teeheehee. This is such a senseless entry. Let me try to put some sense in it.

Was reading some people's blogs and tumblrs just now. And I came to the conclusion that, you just need to be contented in a relationship so that you can be truly happy. I think I should thank God for my boyfriend. As in, I am not sure if y'all saw this previously at my tumblr, but when I first got together with him, he already told me this:

I don't think I can be sweeter to you than this. Not because I don't want to. But I think this is the standard that I can keep going for life. 

Not gonna deny that at first when I look at the other couples around me, I will go, "shit but they are so sweet and like he is not doing anything for me :(" I will be all envious and jealous. But as time goes by, I start to think that if I have an extraordinarily sweet boyfriend from the start, I am not sure if I can control myself from comparing in the future.

Like, I will confirm start to say things like, "Last time... you did... and now don't even have ..." and I bet he is just going to be irritated right? I can totally foresee myself doing that cos I think if you are sweet to a person during the chase, you should be sweet to the person even after the chase correct?

But my boyfriend is still considered sweet by normal standards. He will buy macs breakfast for me occasionally to surprise me, change his poker timings just so that he can catch a movie with me after my exams, cook random meals for me :) So I am not complaining.


So I guess, being in love does not only mean finding the perfect person in the world, like the sweetest guy and everything. I guess, it's about finding the perfect person for you. And at this point of time, 6 months into the relationship, I think he is pretty decent for me. It's like our characters fit. Well, most of the time. (Okay, I will spare you the agony of listening to the details of our quarrels)

Yeap okay people, morale of the story, be contented with what you have, don't compare. But if you think that he is not the right one for you, maybe it's time to rethink the decision while you are still young :)

Disclaimer though. I am not saying that the boyfriends who are extraordinarily sweet to their girlfriends now will not be sweet to them in the future. I am just saying that most of the cases are like that. And I belong to the class of girls who will compare the past and the present. Okay, time for bed. He looks so happy rolling on his carpet -.- Grrr.

Love you and love you even more if you made it through this longggggg entry. Reward you with another cute picture that is my desktop wallpaper now.

GUESS WHO IS GOING TO BKK???

ME ME ME ME ME! Omg I am so excited for this short getaway seriously. =D University life literally kills? Like every exam I feel like I am dying. Every time I do the PYPs, I feel like crying cos it all looks so damn difficult. FM was quite a disaster. AA101 was manageable (the paper I had today). GD03, I was God-like (only  because we could prepare the answers beforehand and just vomit out errathing!)

One more paper and it's over! (: Then it's off to the lands of Vietnam (I don't really feel like going) and Bangkok in start of June. HOMGZXZ Eggxited or what girls and boys? :)

Alrighty, time to hocus pocus focus on my last and final paper (: Feels like I am talking to myself cos no one really knows this blog yet. But oh well :D

Cheers to all you people who have endured and finish the race!
Those who haven't, LET'S GO!

Stressed Pie :(

I am so stressed. This accounting really a last warning. Why so tough ley? :'( And I am always like a blur fuck so careless here and there.... GRRRRR. HELLO WAKE UP THE IDEA YO! :'(

Okay, need to stop giving myself undue stress and worry. Breathe inez, breathe.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH -sinks into panic attack-

Sleep talking

Cutie pie boyfriend!

He fell asleep while accompanying me (I had to study fmntul). And while I was rolling on the bed reading my notes, I heard, "Ineh eh what is the... what is the...? Ineh! Ineh!" -.-'''

He was sleeptalking.

Tried to ignore him and let him sleep talk all the way but he ended up calling my name like more than five times. Lol or what? So I just replied, "Shut up baby, you're sleeptalking!"


Heeheehee too cute too cute!

jarofcheckeredhearts;

Wanted to have jarofhearts.blogspot.com but thought that it was too plain, so it became jarofcheckeredhearts. No reason, just cos I like plaid stuff. From plaid shirts to plaid designs to my guy in a plaid shirt :)

This place shall be a small little piece of heaven for me. For me to rant long posts when I don't want to clog up my friends' tumblr pages. Maybe I just might move here for good. We shall see :D

Wenyi popped by with some gongcha and slippers (cos mine broke during my granny's funeral). Much love to this girl seriously. One of the bestest friends I can ever find :D :D :D

Okay now it's back to work, shall update when I feel like it.

Till then.