KAZAM

These are the people whom I spent 5 whole days with. The second time in my life that I spent 5 days with only minimal amount of sleep. Oh my goodness. I really felt like dying at different points during the camp. I was really fighting to keep my eyes awake at some points. 

This camp opened my eyes to many things. Including the need for giving in when it comes to friendship problems. No particular friend will be the perfect friend for you. Just simply because of the reason, no one is perfect. Even friends whom you know for damn bloody long. It's really shocking when you see the different sides of your friends that throw you off your feet. And when you realise that actually, your friends judge you just like how any other acquaintance would. Honestly, at that moment, it really hurt quite a bit.

But there's something that I've learnt throughout the whole episode. If the friendship is something that you value a lot, you will learn to give in eventually. 

You will learn to close one eye to the judgments your friends put on you, you will learn to close one eye to the perspectives they have of you. No matter how much it hurts, you will learn to close an eye. 

Watching this damn amazing Taiwan drama right now. The guy is like so damn sweetz. Sigh. 

And one thing that I mega buay tahan throughout this camp. I have become so fucking tanned. You think I look normal in the picture right? Like the tan look quite healthy right? Try comparing it to the girl next to me who's drinking. What the fuck ley that's like 3 shades darker than her. 

I am like a fucking abnn now lah :( Not that I don't enjoy being tanned, but not this tanned! This is too much already :O 

And the color contrast between the tanned parts and the normal skin tones just too great. I look like a clown, as quoted from my boyfee :( 

Sucks to be me. Okay back to watching my drama. And what nots. 

Because we are only human;

It's so torturous to have to deal with so many problems and maybe end up with no one to say it to. I mean, who can we tell 100% of our problems to? Even if we don't, it's not necessarily our fault. I think? 

Someone once told me, "If you were to ask around, I think you'd be the one with most of my secrets."

Yeah, most. Not all. But most. Why?

I guess we tell people the things that we are comfortable in telling them. For example, you smoke (just saying) and you know of friends who are okay with you smoking and friends who are strongly against you smoking. It's only normal for you to want to tell friends who are okay and supportive rather than face the wrath of your other friends right?

No one, no one, will ever have the full access to whatever is going on in your heart and mind.

And that's the saddest part about being human. 

Alone

I don't like the feeling of being alone, being left out or whatsoever. I am just, too vulnerable. Today is such a day full of rants. Goodbye. 

Dilemma

Oh yeah.

There's a dilemma in my life recently.

To go for exchange in Year 2 Sem 2 or not. 

Sigh. 

Someone, help. 

Life's been boring lately which shows from the lack of updates. Watched Charmed Season 1 right now :) Love Charmed from eons ago. And my boyfriend thinks that Phoebe is very hot. Heh I think Piper is hotter though. I am so damn bored cos I am in hall and there is absolutely nothing to do other than watching videos online. Sigh pie :( Why like that. 

Might be going prawning later. I hope things will look more interesting and probably a little less awkward. I don't know how to put this oh well till the time when I find the right words then. 

I need money! Worked for 2 events so far... And the total amount collected would probably be 4XX. Pathetic though because for the amount of effort that I put in, the reward is just too little. 

Okay, boyfriend's here. Till next time then, lil secret space.